From Wild Man To Wise Man
a good guide for the spiritual half of the Tectonic School journey
It’s no secret that there is a big problem with how boys are growing up. That’s one of the central reasons for starting the Tectonic School project. When failure arises, the question is always “where did we go wrong?”
This is the quest that many aspiring gurus have embarked on, looking back at many forking paths of human history, trying to determine which particular turn has placed us on the path to destruction.
Was it the industrial revolution? Nancy Pearcey makes a very good case for that one. Was it the age of enlightenment? The reformation? The great schism of 1054? Maybe it was Constantine’s implementation of the Christian state, or perhaps we need to go back to the bronze age, to a pre-Christian paganism.
A certain following has arisen around leaders who advocate for each of these hypotheses, and in each case, a return to ancient tradition is seen as the cure. Yet it's likely that at each of these waypoints, we could have found someone else saying the same things; many of them recorded in the Bible. “We never should have left Egypt!” all the way back to the very first crisis of masculinity - “It was the woman’s fault”
Taking a wide view of history reveals that these problems are perennial. It may be a different subset or a greater percentage, but some men have always had a struggle finding the path to wisdom and maturity in any given age. Those who do find the path often encounter even more struggles. It’s the men who fit into the system of the day who really miss out. Failing to meet any challenge, they hold their fellow man in contempt, because the path that seems obvious to them fits within the culture of the day.
Whoever those men might be in our age, they are not the target audience. We want to reach the men who are struggling to find the way. Father Richard Rohr has been seeking to guide such men along a path for many decades. While his is a controversial name in many conservative Christian circles, there is a reason why he is succeeding where they are failing.
Many pastors and influencers will make lists of books and authors to “avoid”, and many of the ones I genuinely like put Rohr at the top of their list. But when I consider my own path, those conservative waters are the ones I swim best in. I can learn and grow happily from the likes of John Piper, Sean McDowell, R.C. Sproul, Michael Heiser and many, many more teachers, preachers and apologists all along the spectrum.
But many boys grow up sitting in healthy evangelical churches and the messages do nothing to engage their soul, while someone like Richard Rohr breaks through where so much “sound gospel teaching” fails.
It was actually the story of a former ordained minister from the Christian Reformed Church that pointed me in the direction of Richard Rohr. I will share his story here.
John was the epitome of someone who knew all the right things to say and believe. His intelligence let him slide through seminary and a ministry career, while his wounded spirit left a trail of injured souls in his wake.
The books and ministry of Richard Rohr provided something that Bavinck and Dooyeweerd could not as he said in another conversation. I had never thought to investigate Rohr one way or the other; the simple admonishment to avoid came from people I trusted, and I don’t have a strong interest in “new age” stuff. But If there was something in there that could break through the bravado and soften the crusty hearts of angry men young and old, I want to learn what it is.
So I read through his book, “From Wild Man to Wise Man - Reflections on Male Spirituality”. I had the thought to share it with a friend who walked away from the Conservative Evangelical Christianity of his youth to embrace a new age lifestyle, and after a few pages I knew it would be something he could benefit from. The strongest complaint from apologetics types is that “Richard Rohr can lead you into the new age” - in reality, Rohr reflects pretty mundane Christian Mysticism, and most rational apologists don’t know what to do with anything “subjective”, despite being part of the universal human experience.
The book contains very short chapters, only a few were more than three pages long; and Rohr makes solid use of analogies and metaphors to describe the stages of a man’s life. Those who are familiar with the work of Jordan Peterson will recognize his use of Jungian archetypes, and these are explained very clearly and used well. There are examples of iconic symbolism, and parables sprinkled throughout, but most of the book is very straightforward prose that anyone can grasp.
Throughout, Rohr uses these various methods as gentle invitations for the reader to assess himself and his own position along the masculine journey. While protestants may complain that he isn’t getting every idea directly from the text of scripture, he uses many scriptural references to back up his point. Perhaps it’s wishful thinking, but I could easily imagine my new age friend cracking open that dusty Bible to see what the author is pointing out. From there, who knows?
Rohr’s image of the complete man is intrinsically tied to the natural roles of sonship and fatherhood - reflecting in the Trinity, and it is not the antithesis of female, because the man and woman are one flesh. The natural role of husband and wife is to learn from one another, and therefore a man is more “complete” when he is able to show kindness, compassion and nurture to his children, even though these are “feminine” traits. I think he is absolutely right in this, a truth that the reactionary “manosphere” is too blind to notice.
There is quite a bit to unpack in this book, and I look forward to revisiting it once I get another copy to replace the one I gave away. One overlooked concept is the archetype of the builder - the Tektōn - which I think integrates all the others in the best possible way - specifically in the person of Jesus. For now, I highly recommend any men who feel like they aren’t sure of the path forward to read this book. You may feel validated, or you may feel upset. Either way, it will reveal something about where you are on your journey, and help you find the path forward.